Huston waited until night came before he woke his little brother up. He could not get himself to fall asleep no matter how hard he tried. He did not think that the soldiers would come back outside, but he did not want to take the chance. What if they came back and Feld was snoring, or they moved accidentally in their sleep and knocked this whole thing over?

He shook Feld and put his hand over his mouth. Feld opened his eyes and looked around, nodded. They both slowly crawled out the same way they had come. It was slow going. They started moving toward the forest. Huston put his arm around Feld and held them both close to the ground as they moved. There were lights on in the house and people yelling at each other and laughing. Some sort of party, Huston assumed. Huston hoped. It was too cold for them to come outside. The nights in the winter in Hillston were not for the faint of heart. 

When they made it to the tree line, Huston grabbed Feld’s hand and they broke into a full run. Huston knew the woods around Hillston well. He and his friends would often play hide and seek for full days when there was no school: Huston was second best. The first best was always his friend Lyra₈₃₁ because she could fit into strange places and she had a memory that was pretty much perfect. Huston had always secretly liked Lyra. He hoped now that she knew that. Wherever she was. He tried to tell her once. They were both hunting for a hiding place together, something that would make the both lose this round. They found a cave and were arguing about who would get to hide in it.  Huston gave up easily. She stopped him as he was walking away.

“Why are you giving up so easy?” She asked. Her tone was skeptical.

He shrugged. “You won’t get caught. You’re better than me.”

“Yeah. We all know that. But we could both hide in here.”

“You know the rules,” he stammered, “two people can’t win.”

“So what? We make the rules. Don’t you want to hide with me?”

She had come out of the cave now. moving toward him in the open forest.

“I do,” Huston managed. He took a step back, found his heart racing.

“Then why are you leaving?” Lyra was very close to him now. He was worried that she could hear his heart beating. He knew that this was the moment. He opened his mouth.

“Because I–”

“Caught!” A voice echoed from the distance. Maquisse. He had caught them both standing there, in the open. Lyra laughed immediately, she would win the next round, and they both walked away from the cave. He never mentioned it to anyone.

They ran for thirty-eight minutes, taking a few short rests when one of them got tired. Huston brought Feld to the small cave he had discovered with Lyra and they stopped. It was far enough away from town.

They would stay there for seventeen days. 

They had both learned basic survival skills as a part of their schooling but the reason for their survival was a lack of interest from the troop occupying Hillston in going back into the forest. They were almost caught only twice₃₀₄₅. 

Feld listened to everything that Huston told him to do without question. This was a departure from their normal relationship, but Huston did not think too much about it. They built a fire in their cave and kept it going through the days and nights. They went out only to gather wood, hunt for food, or check their traps. Huston was fourteen now and so he had learned in school how to catch small animals and how to tell edible berries from the ones that would make you sick. He mostly sent Feld to gather wood and they would both return excited to share their bounty with one another.

They would eat together every night. Huston would often start a conversation only to have it fizzle quickly. After the first few days it was mostly silent as they ate, but Huston decided that it was okay.  When Feld was younger and they would walk home from school together, Feld would never stop talking₇₁₆. It was like Feld had grown up just a little. They both became okay with silence.

Huston could tell that Feld was getting anxious even though Feld did not say anything. He had started to draw in the snow outside of their cave₄₄₃. At home he only did that when he was worried that something bad was going to happen. When a report card was about to come or he knew a teacher would be stopping by, Feld would always be in the front yard tearing away at the ground with a stick.

Huston was worried about him, especially considering what would have to come next.

That night they were eating a small shrew beside the fire and Huston turned to Feld.

“What do you think we should do,” he asked.

Feld stopped eating for a moment and looked up at Huston. He shrugged.

“I don’t know,” he said. And he took another bite, “I thought we were just staying here.”

Huston looked over at Feld and Feld avoided eye contact.

“We can’t.”

“Why not?”

“It’s cold enough now but when it gets warm they’ll come back into the forest. Maybe to find food. Maybe just to explore. They’ll find us.”

“So then we should wait until it’s almost warm before we go, right?”

Feld’s voice was shaky but strong. Huston could tell that he was trying to be brave. He asked, “Is that what you want?”

They looked at each other and Huston could see tears in his brothers eyes.

“Whatever is going to make us most safe.” A voice crack.

Huston moved closer to his brother and put an arm around him. 

They sat in silence, eating,

Feld looked up at him, “It makes me nervous being in this cave. It feels like people are still out to get us and I can’t sleep very good.”

“It makes me nervous, too. I think we should go.”

“Really?” There was true excitement in his voice, “We can go back home?”

“No,” and he saw his brother’s face fall, “We can’t. Not now at least.”

“But why not? All of them are probably living in that man’s house.”

“Maybe. But they had uniforms, Feld.”

“So what?”

Huston thought for several moments about how to help his brother understand. He remembered something he had learned when he was almost Feld’s age in school.

“Do you remember the 15 Year Conflict₁₁₉₁?” His brother’s eyes lit up.

“Yeah! It’s such a cool war.”

“What,” Huston asked, confused. He had never heard anyone refer to the war that way.

“I mean, not cool. But interesting. A lot of people died but the right people won. And we read about Isabella and all of that.” Feld held up both of his fists. Huston knew he was trying to recreate the famous posters of Isabella from her final speech.

“Right. It was a war. And there were two sides. The sides that were okay with people coming over and…”

“And the people that were afraid!”

“Yes. Do you remember who was on each side?”

Feld thought.
“Um…not really. We only talked about it a little bit so far.”

“That’s okay. It doesn’t matter. The thing is that each side, once things got going, each side wore something different. Different uniforms.”

“Okay.”

“That happens whenever there’s a war. And the uniforms all had different patches for the sides and stuff, right.”

“I guess. I’ve seen some pictures.”

“Those people were wearing uniforms. They were all wearing the same thing. And they all had guns.”

Feld looked down and Huston could see him figuring it out. He saw confusion and sadness.

“But why would we be at war? Who would we be warring with?”

“I don’t know,” Huston responded, “But Hillston is a small place. It’s on purpose that we don’t know that much about other places. The adults wanted to keep us away from all of that stuff. But…” His voice trailed.

“But it didn’t work. They sent bombs and people.”

“Yeah.”

There was a long silence. Neither of them wanted to say what they were both thinking but Huston knew that because he was the oldest he had to. He hugged his brother closer.

“We can’t go back home. It’s not our home anymore.”

They finished their dinner and fell asleep close to each other and the next morning Huston and Feld left their camp. It was eighteen days after the bomb had hit Hillston.

Huston led them west through the forest even though he did not know where to go. The small cave was the furthest he’d been away from Hillston. But he didn’t tell Feld. He tried to seem brave and confident.. They moved slowly in their winter jackets and snow boots and stopped frequently. Huston was skilled at catching small animals that hid from the weather in holes and there were plenty of streams to the east and so the two remained well fed and hydrated as they walked and climbed. It was not an easy journey.